I've been asked a lot lately why I'm doing my body sculpting comp. It didn't dawn on me until recently why this is such an important goal and huge milestone for me in life. Yes, I want to look good, and there is some vanity in what I'm doing, but the real reason goes so much deeper than that.
Most people won't realise this, but my passion for health and fitness came later in life. Prior to my 20's, the only regular exercise I'd participated in was dancing at nightclubs haha.
I tried and failed at sport many times as a child. One of my earliest and most painful memories is of attempting to learn to swim. Not being a naturally sporty child, it took me a long time to pick it up, and after a couple of months of a grumpy swim teacher and a grumpy mother, that was given up on. Ballet lessons only lasted a year, because again I didn't pick it up very naturally/easily.
My next failed sporting memory was at school, attempting to play a game of cricket. When it was my turn to bat, everyone who was fielding moved in close, because they already knew sport wasn't my forte. Every time there was team sports this was repeated, and it was a given that I would come last at any kind of competition like cross country (often I wouldn't even manage to finish).
Next was joining a netball team ( I think I was around 10 or 11 years old). The first time we got together as a team, I burst into tears because I had never played before and I had no idea what I was doing. All of the other girls had played before, so I was picked on and laughed at, not just by my team members, but also their mothers. We used to take along $2 each week for our end of season trip. I never missed paying, but when the trip was organised, I wasn't invited. Needless to say I didn't play a 2nd season.
High school was even worse. I would try to wag P.E as much as possible, just to avoid the embarrassment of not being good enough. When I was forced to do a beep test (where you have to run to either end of the room in time for the beep), I was always the first to be told to stop.
Lucky for me, my wonderful husband came into my life when I was 20, and he got me going to the gym. I think lifting weights appeals to me because I'm not competing with anyone else, and I can put on my music and get in my zone. I LOVE IT!
Why am I competing? This is the first time in my life that I don't feel like a failure when it comes to sport. This is pushing me to my limits and forcing me to step outside of my comfort zone. Wake up feeling tired? Too bad, I have to train. Having a bad day? Too bad, I have to stick to my diet. It is taking a huge commitment, mentally, physically and emotionally.
My comp is still 9 weeks out and I am quite amazed at how much it has taught me and changed me for the better already. I can't wait to see what's next! Watch this space :o)
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